Remember

I wish I remembered all of the things that mattered to me. I mean actually remember, not just that I went to a place or saw an event, but remember what was said and what I liked about it so much. I wish the pictures I took reminded me of something other than the sadness […]

Once More

It is as if everything is ending at once, but this happens every November. It is the season changing more than anything, because if anything ends this time of year, the cold weather, snow and lack of light arrive to remind you that there is no such thing as an endless summer here. Along side […]

Eight.Three

I wasn’t supposed to live this long. I shouldn’t have lived much past eighteen. I don’t know if I would have even made it that far; the doctors never said anything about that. And I was certain, even after I had been cleared, that something would come along and that would be the end. Eighteen […]

Forward, March

I have found myself recently to be stuck in a way. It is hardly a matter of being able to make a decision, but more as if I feel I am running a marathon through the mud. It is as if every motion requires a calculation; how does turning this wrench help support my final […]

Without Resonance

I experienced something I never expected. It left me feeling cold and emotionless, not far from my usual state, but in a different way. I hardly felt it at all and yet I feel I should have. I feel as though it may find me later, maybe months or years down the road. My significant […]

Incandescent

Routines are life. Repetition is life, at least for most of us. The days pass at a rate or normalcy we become accustomed to and regardless of how much we despise such a routine and unvaried life we continue to follow it. In simple terms, it is hard to break free. February 14, 2018 2:30PM […]

Interred

I never allowed my acquaintances to get too close, and even my friends know very little of me. It is intentional, and I will likely remain this way, as I feel no need to burden others with this nonsense that plagues me. Even you do not have to read this, it is simply a choice […]

Deontologist

Anxiety is crushing. I’d expand but you either know the feeling or you do not. So anxiety is crushing, but so is gravity. Gravity did not stop us from shooting for the moon did it? It does not stop us from trying to play baseball. Can you escape gravity? Certainly…just break through the atmosphere. If […]

22:32-22:47

A rough few days will turn into a rough few weeks and a rough few years if you let it. Easier said than done, but don’t let it. You control every minute of how you feel, even if you don’t see it that way. Even when you feel like you have no control. It is […]

Cartographs

I’ve spent a great deal of time mapping out what I wanted to, but as we all find out, life will not go according to plan. I’ve re-drawn the map dozens of time in my mind, but it doesn’t matter; it’ll change again. This time I changed it myself, but I’m still unsure if it’s […]

inthenovember

The anticipation of Light, from a new sun

november